Beans With Extra Guac
by Redvine Sistas
Summary: Welcome to Beans with Extra Gauc! Be ready to be enertained with laugh your ass off fun! Here we interview diffrent stars from books and movies! And pray that nothing goes wrong!  our praying never works
1. Chapter 1

**DISCLAIMER: We do not own Percy Jackson, Twilight, or the Outsiders.  
>Reyna: Enough with the freaking disclaimers!<br>Angel: I need to pee…  
>Artemis: hehehe..Why the heck am I laughing?<strong>

**ON WITH THE SHOW!**

Reyna: Welcome to Beans with Extra Gauc!

Artemis: Since when were we called Beans with Extra Gauc?

Reyna: Since Ive loved tacos

Angel: You've always loved tacos?

Reyna: What are you? Blonde!

Angel: Ye-N…no?

Artemis: Excuse her, she was dropped on her head at a young age. Back to the show! Everyone welcome our first guest star! Son of the sea god, Percy Jackson!

Percy: Hey

Angel: You smell of sweat. And horse.

Percy: Uh, right.

Reyna: Ange…

Artemis: So how's Nico?

Percy: What?

Artemis: You know, hot emo guy? How is he?

Percy: Um…Good I guess.

Reyna: SO! We heard you did a movie, how was that?

Percy: Are you the only sane one?

Artemis: So, tomatoes or potatoes?

Angel: Tomatoes, they're shinier.

Percy: That would be a yes, right?

Reyna: Nah, there's Bob, the camera man.

Bob: YAYA!

Percy: Right…okay, so, uh, the movie?

Reyna: Oh, how was the movie?

Percy: I didn't have a part if that's what your wondering. The movie was based off of me.

Artemis: They made you look like Zac Effron

Percy: Yes, yes they did. I personally think they screwed up every character.

Angel: How did Clarisse feel to not be in the movie?

Percy: WHOAH! God you pop out of nowhere…Not good. I became king of the bathroom urinals.

Artemis: sooooo…She whooped your ass?

Percy: Wha- no!

Angel: Sure, whatever you say fishboy.

Reyna: What did you like most about the movie?

Percy: Probably how they made Annabeth brunette.

Angel: ._.

Reyna: ._.

Artemis: XD

Percy: Did- I- uh do something wrong?

Angel: HOW DARE YOU INSULT ANNABETH LIKE THAT? GET THE HELL OUTTA HERE!

Reyna: How many times do I have to tell you NOT to threaten our guests' stars with a knife?

Angel: As many times as ive done it?

Reyna: Correct.

Artemis: Who would've figured Angel would actually pass a test in her whole life?

Angel: Hey! IM not that stupid!

Artemis: Oh really? Then what's Pi times Pi?

Angel: Easy! Its cake!

Reyna: Ugh, than what's two times two?

Angel: Fish.

Artemis: Eleven plus eleven?

Angel: Window.

Reyna: Your on drugs.

Angel: What kind?

Artemis: Okay, were changing the subject. Our next guest star is…Edward Cullen!

Angel: Fuck

Reyna: BAD ANGEL!

Edward: Should I…Leave?

Artemis: What was with the dramatic hair flip?

Edward: Trade mark

Reyna: Your ugly.

Edward: ._. Right.

Angel: Yay! I get to be the mature one this time!

Artemis: Is that even possible?

Reyna: TACOS! Your still ugly.

Edward: I- I think im just gonna go.

Artemis: Wow, it is possible.

Angel: So Edward! What is your favorite thinks about Twilight?

Edward: Um, the fact that I get to hang out with my best bud. Jacob!

Jacob: YAYA!

Edward: I love ya man!

Jacob: Bro hug!

Crowd: Awwww

Angel: Ya ya ya. Cute the sap. Why the hell do you not have a shirt on!

Jacob: Trade mark

Angel: ._. right

Reyna: Hey! Hey! Hey you!

Jacob: What?

Reyna: Turn into a wolf.

Jacob: You want to see me naked?

Everyone: NO!

Jacob: Then shut up.

Reyna: ….bitch…

Artemis: Ang-an- Angel! Come back here!

Angel: Be right back! Gotta pee! Gotta pee! Gotta pee!

Artemis: So, its all up to me then?

Edward: Seems that way.

Artemis: God, Angel and her tiny ass bladder. Were gonna do the show my way then!

Reyna: Oh no. DUCK AND COVER!

Artemis: Wha- no! Reyna! Don't leave me!

Reyna: Come on Wolfy boy! Were running away! Were running away!

Jacob: Um…okay?

Edward: Looks like its just you and me.

Artemis: Get out of here. Im bringing in the real deal.

Edward: What?

Artemis: You heard me! Out!...And as our next guest star, everyone put your hands together for the badass Thalia Grace!

Thalia: Fuc- How the hell did I get here?

Artemis: That's for me to know and for you to shut up. So Thalia, what's your favorite thing about the world of mythology?

Thalia: Uh huh, I guess the fact I can shot anyone full of lightning/

Artemis: Badass/ So Have you heard of Fan fiction?

Thalia: Sure.

Artemis: So you know all about the love…square?

Thalia: No.

Artemis: Between you being called Thalico, Thuke or Perlia.

Thalia: What the fuck?

Artemis: So lets hear it. Who do you choose?

Thalia: I guess I choose-

Angel: BACK!

Artemis: GROAN! Don't you have to go pee?

Angel: …no. I just went.

Artemis: Fine. You totally ruined it all.

Angel: Hey! Thals! – wait. Your…you…

Thalia: Thalia Grace

Angel: Your-your-your

Thalia: Did she break?

Artemis: She broke a long long looonnggg time ago.

Thalia: Right.

Nico: *singing* OH THALIA! WONT YOU BEEE MY GIRRLLL?

Thalia: Nico, what the hell are you doing? Don't you have a Mytho-magic tournament or something?

Nico: Trying to win your love! *Singing* OH BABY BABY ! WHOOPS I DID IT AGAIN! GOT LOST IN THE GAME-

Luke: *singing* IM GONNA MARY THE NIGGGHTT!

Thalia: L-luke?

Nico: She's mine man! Fuck off!

Luke: Whatever.

Nico and Luke: *singing* IS IT OKAY TO LET MY HANDS DO WHAT THEY WANT. C-C-CLOSE YOUR EYES AND YOUR THERE.

Thalia: What the hell?

Nico: *singing* FIVE O CLOCK IN THE MORNING, CONVERSATION GOT BORING.

Thalia: NICO!

Nico: What?

Thalia: No.

Nico: Fine.

Luke: *singing* IT WAS DARK, AND IT WAS OVER. UNTIL YOU KISSED MY LIPS AND YOU SAVED ME. MY HANDS, THEYRE STRONG, BUT MY KNEES WERERE FAR TOO WEAK.

Angel: I- I hink I need to pee again.

Nico: *singing* WE COULDVE HAD IT ALL. ROLLING IN THE DEEEP

Thalia: BOTH OF YOU! SHUTUP!

Artemis: Uh oh.

Thalia: Luke. Just leave. Your dead, or suppose to be dead.

Luke: KK! *singing* NEVER MIND ILL FIND SOMEONE LIKE YOOUUUU. I WISH NOTHING BUT THE BEST FOR YOU TOO. DON'T FORGET ME I SWEAR

Nico: *singing* YOUR BEAUTIFUL. YOUR BEAUTIFUL ITS TURE.

Thalia: Nico.

Nico: *singing* WHEN I SAW YOU ONE THE SUBWAY SHE WAS WITH ANOTHER MAN.

Thalia: Nico.

Nico: *Singing* WHAN I WALKED ON Y! YOU COULD TEMM FROM MY FACE THAT I WAS FUCKING HI-

Artemis: That's it.

Nico: Wh- WAIT! WAIT! NO!

Artemis: NO SINGING ALLOWED!

Nico: *girly scream*

Thalia: Back already?

Artemis: We confidently located the studio near a death defying cliff.

Thalia: Nice

Angel: Sooo…Nicos dead?

Artemis: More than likely no.

Reyna: Come on Wolfy boy! Live!

Angel: Now what happened?

Reyna: The house burned down with children in it

Thalia: Why is he naked?

Reyna: He wolfed up to help them

Angel: DO you think he's dead?

Artemis: Can I poke him with a stick?

Reyna: Mmm…he's dead. Can I poke him with a knife?

Artemis: Does that mean I can?

Thalia: Knock yourself out.

THIS CONCLUDES THE FIRST EPISODE OF BEANS WITH EXTRA GAUC!


	2. Chapter 2

**DISCLAIMER: We do not own Hunger Games, Twilight, or Percy Jackson  
>Reyna: I really want some tacos right now..<br>Angel: With some orange juice.  
>Reyna: Oh yea, totally<br>Artemis:...somebody shoot me.  
>Angel:OKAY!<br>ReynaL: NO! ANGEL PUT THE GUN DOWN!  
><strong> 

**ON WITH THE SHOW..?**

Reyna: Welcome to Beans with Extra Guac!

Artemis: SOMEBODY HELP! GET THE GUN AWAY FROM HER! HELP!

Angel: DIE! DIE! DIE EVIL PERSON!

Reyna:Excuse me... WILL YOU TWO SHUTUP! IM TYRING TO RUN OUR SHOW!

Angel: Yes ma'am.

Reyna: Good girl! Who wants a treat? Who wants a treat?

Angel: I do! I do!

Artemis: What! She goes after me with a gun and you give her a treat!

Reyna:..Yep.

Artemis: Thats just messed up.

Reyna: Go get it girl! Go get it!

Angel: BARK BARK BARK!

Artemis: Did..did she just run out on all fours barking like a dog?

Reyna: yep.. *sniff* our little Angel is growing up.

Artemis: riiiight...You understand our guest stars are back there, right?

Reyna: Shit! Really?

Artemis: Ye-

Angel: BARK BARK BARK!

Peeta: SOMEBODY HELP ME!

Reyna: Angel get off Peeta's back NOW!

Angel: GRRRRR

Peeta: Please help me...

Artemis: I find there is some sort of irony here...

Reyna: ANGEL! DOWN!

Angel: Hmmph.

Reyna: Good girl..

Peeta: ...FREEDOM! YES! YESSSS!

Artemis: Feel free to take a seat Peeta.

Peeta: Thanks.

Artemis: Well, since Reyna is busy spraying Angel with water...I guess I get to run the show.

Peeta: ...You guys have insurance, right?

Artemis: Um..what the hell is insurance?

Peeta:...nevermind.

Artemis: So Peeta, your movie has recently been released to theaters. Beating Twilights sales, what are your comments on that?

Peeta: They made me seem like a stalker.

Reyna: IMMMM BAAACK!

Artemis: Where's Angel?

Reyna: In the corner thinking about her life.

Peeta: I think Im just going to go...

Reyna: YOU DONT LEAVE UNLESS YOU WANT YOUR INTERNAL ORGANS FEASTED UPON.

Peeta: hehe. hehe...oookay.

Artemis: So um, Peeta, what do you expect from the next movie, Catching Fire?

Peeta: Well, I expect some fire catching.

Artemis:...Have you read the books?

Peeta: No.

Artemis: ._.

Reyna: ._.

Artemis: righhht, okay..

Angel: PEETA CHEW TOOOYY!

Peeta: AGH! HELP! HELP! AHHH!

Artemis: Aren't you going to stop her? She just pounced on our guest star...

Reyna: Nah, she already sunk her fangs in his skull. Once her teeth are latched on, she's not letting go.

Angel: CHEW TOY! CHEW TOY! CHEW TOY!

Artemis:..Have we ever checked Angel for rabies?

Reyna: Nope. Pass the popcorn.

Peeta: HELP MEEEE!

Reyna: And our next guest star is...Isabella Swan. Shit.

Artemis: Oh god.

Bella: deerrrrrrr

Reyna: Come take a seat Bella.

Bella: Der der derrrrr

Reyna: Riiight

Bella: Der Der Der Der Derrrr Der

Reyna: So uh... Bella, its nearing the end of the series for the movies. What are you going to miss the most?

Bella: Der Deeerrrr Der Deerrr

Peeta: IM STILL HERE! SOMEBODY HELP!

Reyna: Peeta, shutup, were trying to host a show!

Peeta: HELP MEEE!

Bella: der der derrrr

Peeta: THATS NOT EVEN ENGLISH! AAHHHh!

Reyna: Artemis..

Artemis: Yea?

Reyna: Take this chainsaw, and solve Peetas little..problem.

Artemis: YES! HAHA!

Peeta: NO NO! DONT LET HER GET NEAR ME- AAHHH!

Bella: Der Derrrr Der

Reyna: Bella, just...just get out.

Bella: Der der derrr

Reyna: Out, or I sick Artemis on you too.

Peeta: HELP! HELP! SOMEBODY CALL THE POLICE!

Bella: der derrrr

Reyna: Yep, bye! ..god, is this show ever going to be normal?

Artemis: Probebly not.

Angel: CHEW TOOOYYYY!

Reyna: Ange- Angel spit him out!

Angel: Fine.

Peeta: FREEEDOM! AGH! NO! NO! SHES OFF OF ME! NO NEED FOR THE CHAINSAW! AHHHH!

Angel:...You gave her a chainsaw?

Reyna: Yea..

Angel: Its illegal to give her chainsaws in some countries.

Reyna: Welcome to America.

Bob: Um, Reyna...

Reyna: WHAT BOB! I DONT HAVE PATIENCE FOR THIS BOB!

Angel: Bob the boob.

Bob: Im, uh, actually your camera man. Not a boob.

Angel: Bob the boob.

Reyna: Angel, do you need to go to time out?

Angel: noo.

Reyna Then go get me a taco.

Angel: okay! Come with me Artemis!

Artemis: I dont want to!

Angel: COME WITH MEEEE! What if I get raped on the way? If Im getting raped, your getting raped with me. Double rape.

Artemis: Whatever.

Bob: Um, Reyna.

Reyna: WHATTT BOB

Bob: The last guest star ran off screaming...

Reyna: Shit. ALRIGHT, WHO MADE THE NEXT GUEST STAR GO MENTAL?

Angel: ._.

Artemis: ._.

Reyna: Fess up.

Angel: SHE DID IT!

Artemis: SHE DID IT!

Bob: So uh... the shows..over.

Reyna: Right...Angel, Artemis..IM GOING TO KILL BOTH OF YOU!

Angel: FIRE DEMON! RUNNNN!

Artemis: Its just Reyna...crap, Reyna is a scary bitch. RUN!

Bob: Wai- Wait guys! You need to close the show!... Um... This was Beans with Extra Gauc... come back next time?...I guess?


End file.
